Exposing Why Getting Quiet is the Key to Stressing Less
Have you ever noticed that when life gets busy and our days become filled with stressful moments, everything becomes louder? Even when our schedules open up or plans change often, my first instinct is to fill the void with some kind of noise (a.k.a chaos) as quickly as possible. I know my military spouses and small business owners feel me in this - sitting in the quiet is hard when you are always on the go!
It happens almost without thinking. To fill the space I’m on the phone more, watching TV more, the music is louder, and I find myself speaking in an outdoor voice just to drown out the quiet. Everything is kicked up a notch, and I surround myself with busy-ness because, somewhere in my mind, I think it will help.
And then, as if by magic, our life is in a twirl. A vortex appears out of nowhere, and I am sucked into a crazy, unable to function, twirl. My coping skills are thrown by the wayside, I forget to tend to my basic needs, and soon the entire household is spinning out of control. It seems as if all of a sudden the world turns on its axis and starts to close in on me, demanding more.
Quickly, my mindset shifts and life becomes unfair. My thoughts begin to focus on the challenges and issues, I quit seeing the good in people, and more than likely, I find that I have an increased need to be understood and heard. I even begin to hate the chaos that comes with life. Sound familiar?
So what can we do when our life is a chaotic mess and we are feeling the magnetic pull of the vortex?
We can get quiet.
The best way to begin calming the chaos and taming the stress vortex is to decrease the volume and increase the amount of quiet in your day. Why is this strategy so important? Because it’s in the quiet that we find the solutions to how we can deal with whatever is going on. It’s in the quiet that we find the answers and are able to catch our breath again. And in the quiet, we reconnect with ourselves. (For more tips on how to be happy in your military life read Judy's book Right Side Up here).
Have you ever felt on the verge of losing it.
You know what I'm talking about, that "help me get it together so I can make it through the day" moment. One of the keys to stressing less amidst that kind of chaos is to find ways to be quiet. (HAHA right.....but hear me out....)
In order to be able to "handle" the chaos we need to listen to our "gut", we need to shut it all off and we need to get quiet. When things are loud, we have to be quiet in order to deal with whatever is going on. That's the key to calming the chaos in your life.
Stress relief comes from allowing quiet in when life is anything but quiet.
This simple technique is KEY, because it is in the silence that we find the solutions, we find answers and we are able to breathe again. It is in the quiet that we are able to find our sanity again, get to be us again and ultimately find our power and strength again.
Still don't believe me? Think back to your best vacations, and ask yourself what did they have in common?
More than likely, the "best" and most rewarding getaways were those that were filled with quiet moments. The lazy beach strolls, the swoosh of the powder as you ski down the mountain, the sound of the tide coming in, the peace once all the kids were finally asleep, the squawk of the sea-gull or the cold crackle of the clear crisp air as you sip coffee and look out onto the new fallen snow.
Quiet allows us to feel, it allows us to relax and it allows us to renew our spirit. Quiet lets our minds work and allows us to deal with the stress and disorder that this lifestyle brings. Honestly the old "Calgon Take Me Away" commercials had it right. The crazier things get the more you need to "get away", and sometimes that just means away from the loudness.
So when you begin to combust, and you know it's coming, turn off the tv, ride in silence or just close your eyes and breathe. I promise you the peace and relief you are seeking will present itself in the stillness.
~Judy Davis, is a motivational speaker, author, mental wellness mentor and network marketing leader as well as a military spouse and caregiver. Judy’s books Right Side Up and Warning Signs: Is Your Teen at Risk are go to resources for families and her website is filled with tips, inspiration and resources for those looking to optimize their mental health and wellness. Connect with Judy at DavisInspired.com